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Trafalgar Square 2009

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The Strange Case of The Hurting Feet

The Strange Case of The Hurting Feet

“My feet hurt Antonio, I have much discomfort from these shoes”

“Look at the height of these heels Manuela, these aren’t walking shoes, these aren’t shoes. Oh why do you wear them Manuela?”

“I have to Antonio, because I’m a girl”

“Yes I did spot that Manuela. But there is no law to say you have to wear them”

“Ahh but there is Antonio! It comes into force when we are in the vicinity of handsome men”

“So you think I am good looking Manuela?”

“Not you Antonio, Ohh. The waiter at the bar we just left”

“Sit on this large, round,warm rock Manuela. Take your shoes off”

“Sí Antonio your idea is good”

“There, that’s better I’ll rub your feet”

“Ooohh por favor Antonio. But rub nothing above the ankle!”

“Sí Manuela I know the rules”

“Why are we here Antonio?”

“Because your feet hurt Manuela”

Not on this large, round, warm rock Antonio. On earth! Why do we exist on earth?”

We all have to be somewhere Manuela”

Do we Antonio? Do we?”

If you didn’t exist you wouldn’t be able to ask whether or not you exist. Besides if you didn’t exist what would I do with these ridiculous shoes with the heels so high. What I mean Manuela is that you exist relative to not existing. If nothing existed then your question would be invalid and therefore wouldn’t exist?”

Have you stopped taking your medication again Antonio? So if nothing existed, would my shoes still exist?”

Probably Manuela, I think they have a reality all of their own”

But how do I know I exist Antonio?”

Because Manuela, you occupy a physical space which cannot be occupied simultaneously by anyone or anything else”

Suppose the ‘physical space’ doesn’t exist Antonio?”

Then you have a problem Manuela. But you do exist Manuela, you are capable of conscious thought”

But they are not very good thoughts Antonio, they are mainly about shoes”

But you still think, therefore you are”

If my thoughts were deeper, more profound, would I exist more Antonio?”

I don’t think there are levels of existence Manuela. I thinks its either on or off”

So I exist on the same level as a deep thinker such as Sherlock Holmes Antonio?”

Sherlock Holmes never existed Manuela”

But my shoes do Antonio?”

Yes Manuela your shoes do”

Antonio? I exist to you but do I exist to someone I haven’t met?”

You still exist Manuela, they are just not aware that you exist”

But if they are not aware of me then I don’t exist to them?”

In a way Manuela but you still physically exist”

Like my shoes Antonio?”

Sí Manuela, like your shoes”


Antonio do you think there is a plan behind the universe?”

If your shoes are anything to go by, No Manuela”

Do you think there is a guiding hand, a hand that placed this large, round,warm rock here for us to sit on for example?”

If there is Manuela his guidance isn’t all that good considering the state of the world”

I suppose he must have to sleep sometime Antonio”

It may not be a man Manuela. The guiding hand may be a woman”

If it’s a woman Antonio, will she wear shoes like mine?”

Not if she’s an intelligent being Manuela”

Why did she create the universe, what’s the plan Antonio?”

It may not even be a woman Manuela. It may be neither male nor female”

If that’s the case Antonio, then what kind of shoes would it wear?”

I don’t think the creator of the universe would have much interest in shoes Manuela”

Then why did it make my shoes exist?”

I don’t think anything could stop your shoes existing Manuela”

Who created the creator Antonio?”

The creator must have always existed”

Sí Antonio, but what was before ‘always’?”

You have asked many profound questions today Manuela, why?”

My feet hurt Antonio”

I will rub them Manuela”

Gracias, but not above the ankle Antonio”



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