The festive season became the vermin season as giant rats roamed Alqueria. Mutated by Remitroot residue and pollution from the Río Verde these huge rodents roamed the Pueblo unchallenged.
A rat dressed as Father Christmas stole every gift in the Village telling the startled children it was new north-pole policy due to ‘La Crisis’. On another occasion two rats walked into the kitchen of the Bar La Casa Devante, rat number one said, “Look at all that food”. Rat number two replied “Ruddy hell a talking rat” and bolted for the safety of the Plaza.
But the Elders of Alqueria had a plan. They were to purposely mutate a cat which would then be set loose on the Village’s giant rat population. It would hopefully drive them into another town, transferring both the rodents and the problem of their eradication.
What could go wrong?
Fluffy was a half Siamese half European cat. Its day consisted of eating, sleeping and sitting on someone’s lap being fondled. An idyllic existence thought Manuela as she fed the feline Remitroot mash. The cat grew in size and ferocity. Cats of standard size scattered before it as the creature consumed alarming quantities of Remitroot products. So much in fact that it forced the commodity price sky high on the black market.
Fluffy used to sleep in the town hall but his purring had started to loosen the stonework. He now slumbered among the fragrant orange trees waiting for the day he would be released among the Town’s unsuspecting vermin. When the day arrived
Fluffy went to work with gusto, intent on supplementing his Remitroot diet with a morsel or two of juicy rodent flesh.
The rats, taking one look at the huge Fluffy departed Alqueria taking with them whatever booty they could carry. The plan had worked well, worked quickly and caused no harm to the environment. An ideal solution with only one drawback.
What do you do with a four metre cross Siamese cat that is now surplus to requirements?
Its daily consumption of Remitroot in all its various forms was ruining the economy of the Village. There were more practical problems as well. A four metre cat licking its genitals in public was quite disturbing for the more innocent of the Town’s population. Children would ask, “Why’s Fluffy doing that Mum?”, “Because it can” was the usual embarrassed reply.
The Elders of Alqueria once more came to the fore with an ingenious plan which nobody else could have possibly thought of. They would breed a giant dog. This of course came as a complete surprise to all and only went to demonstrate the lateral thinking of which the leaders of Alqueria are capable.
What could go wrong?